Celentano does a heist: SUPER RAPINA A MILANO (1964)

Members of the Celentano Clan rob a bank in the middle of Milan. Their valises full of money, the gang escape via a helicopter, leaving an armed dummy to guard the hostages. The robbers later land in the countryside, dress up as monks and occupy a recently abandoned monastery, intending to lie low for a while till the heat is off. Predictably, things don't go quite as planned. Celentano's former buddy-come Police inspector is after them. One of the Clan members decides to split, only to return shortly in the company of some armed bandits, a machine-gun-toting Ivan Rassimov (billed here as Ivan Rassimovich!) among them. The final act sees the monastery become a battle ground, phoney monks trying to save the real ones and and not to lose their money to the attackers.

The lovely Claudia Mori, Celentano's lifelong companion.

Direction of SUPER RAPINA A MILANO is credited to the star, Adriano Celentano. The IMDb, however, states that the film was actually directed by Piero Vivarelli, while the actor/singer simply received the on-screen credit. Celentano is a surprisingly confident lead. Not a properly trained actor, he exudes energy and is obviously enjoying himself throughout. Music by Detto Mariano (MIAMI GOLEM) is highly effective, rendering some scenes of this farcical film unusually dramatic. During the shoot-out, Gino Santercole is trying to get the gunman up on the bell-tower. After wasting a few rounds, he succeeds. The man plunges down. But before he hits the ground, Gino puts another bullet through him! Intentional or not, this moment of excess is one of the most hilarious in the whole film.

Ivan Rassimov, looking meaner than ever in B/W Cinemascope.

Gino Santercole went on to appear in Lenzi's nasty MILANO ODIA: LA POLIZIA NON PUO SPARARE while Don Backy essayed a part of Blade in Mario Bava's excellent CANI ARRABIATI. But these violent films would come much later, in the 70's. SUPER RAPINA A MILANO is from 1964, so things are fairly light-hearted and the whole armed robbery subject is viewed rather romantically. There is some blatant moralizing courtesy of Celentano, when Celentano-actor switches on the TV and sees Celentano-singer performing. The viewer is then treated to a blessedly brief monologue on the existence of legal ways of getting prosperous.

the luckless Inspector Callani.

As one expects from vintage Italian cinema, the Cinemascope camerawork is frequently mobile and highly inventive. There's no DoP credit on the print, but Giancarlo Ferrando was the camera operator. The over-the-top ending relies on a dodgy twist to spare the sympathetic robbers an inevitable term behind bars. SUPER RAPINA A MILANO is an excellent light-hearted 60's picture full of endearing eccentricity which makes European comedy so special.

LE PORTE DEL SILENZIO (1991)

Plot in one sentence: paunchy, psychotic estate agent John Savage spends a hellishly boring day on the road, driving towards an oh so predictable conclusion.

As the opening credits kick in, set to a wonderful big band score, you anticipate a great story which is about to unfold... alas, it's just one more Filmirage movie.

The first shot of John Savage in the film is so nice it feels like it's coming from a different, better-quality production. Throughout LE PORTE DEL SILENZIO there are moments which stick out and hint at what could have been.

These two images could be coming from a certain Don Coscarelli movie...

Obstacles our supposed protagonist has to overcome are decidedly unexciting: he gets pulled over by cops (but they let him go quite easily), his car gets stuck in the mud, he has to wait at a red traffic light and so on - and this is supposed to be a supernatural thriller movie?

Although only Franco Piana is credited as the composer, there are also stock 'horror' cues in the film that sound like Carlo Maria Cordio's work. They possibly come from Fulci's THE TOUCH OF DEATH and Lattanzi's KILLING BIRDS.

Camera and crew reflected in the car door - a rare amusing moment
in an otherwise monotonous film.

LE PORTE DEL SILENZIO could have made a passable 20-minute film. As a feature it is insufferably long. Little is to be gained from the experience, even for people who are 'into' Fulci.

Can I recommend LE PORTE DEL SILENZIO? - Only to those who are absolutely dying to see what Louisiana back roads looked like circa 1991. Anyone looking for any substance or a story that actually progresses should steer clear of this one.

For an alternative take on Fulci's final film, please read Nigel's review HERE.
There is also a nice review from Eric Cotenas HERE.

revisiting BLOODY PSYCHO (1989)

A distant castle.
Narrow street filmed through a rain-splashed windscreen of a car.
Wet newspapers spread over the cobblestones.
Opening shots of BLOODY PSYCHO accompanied by Lanfranco Perini music set up the mood with remarkable ease. The title card is also a bit more elaborate than what they tend to serve you up with in these 'Lucio Fulci presents' films.

BLOODY PSYCHO is full of talking heads

Doctor Vogler, portrayed by Peter Hinz (THE HOUSE OF CLOCKS) in a surprisingly sympathetic turn, arrives at a castle to treat a wheelchair-bound Signora Rezzori. In the meantime locals are getting killed by a zombie - also in a wheelchair!

Bizarre and suggestive yoghurt-feeding scene

Cinematography by Silvano Tessicini (who has lensed most of 'Lucio Fulci Presents' titles) is very good, considering the budget limitations. Of course, they couldn't afford elaborate tracking shots or anything - but a few imaginative set-ups really help big this cheap film up. Night atmosphere is captured especially vividly with just a few sources of light creating some nice visuals.

Tell me if this isn't a live action version of Ned Flanders!

There is an attempt at Fulci-style protracted gore scene but it doesn't come off too well.
A blonde clad in nothing but a Macintosh walking through an Italian castle on a stormy night is a highlight, though. There's also a Vaseline-lensed flashback!

This lady ends up tough-talking her own lewd
zombie grandmother!

I admit that I enjoyed BLOODY PSYCHO a great deal more the second time around. You accept a lot of the film's idiosyncrasies and just enjoy the ride.

Paul Muller, a 'Lucio Fulci presents' mainstay, stealing
the show as Lawyer Cohen

Modern day no-budget DV filmmakers could learn a thing or two from these films, which are examples of quality craftsmanship on minuscule budgets.

Vassili Karis of GIALLO A VENEZIA chewing scenery

All 'Lucio Fulci presents" fims I've seen are sloppy. But each of them also has something special. Some second-rate magic that has saved these films from total obscurity.

Evil sacristan from Soavi's THE CHURCH serving beer
in a village caf? - Only in BLOODY PSYCHO!

Umberto's descent: HELL'S GATE

A group of speleologists led by a Boring Old Man (Giacomo Rossi-Stuart in one of his final screen appearances) descends into the caves in search of their colleague who's suddenly vanished after spending 76 days underground as a part of some experiment. Down below they find a paperback of Umberto Eco's 'The Name of the Rose' and no trace of their fellow member. Before long, light bulbs and even video cameras (installed in the cave to monitor the progress of the experiment) begin to explode.

Veteran director tries to make up for the retarded story with regular firework displays and, for the most part, fails.

Lenzi's primitive time-waster was produced by Alpha Cinematographica, the same outfit that gave us some of the wonderfully awful 'Lucio Fulci presents' films.

John Carpenter famously created 'cheap scare' scenes by things suddenly popping up into frame or by racking focus to reveal something unexpected. Our beloved Umberto strives to achieve similar effect by employing the crash-zoom, which isn't exactly frightening but does have a certain charm.

HELL'S GATE was filmed (well, the above ground scenes of it) on the same location as Lamberto Bava's GRAVEYARD DISTURBANCE and Deran Serafian's INTERZONE.

If you can get over the unimaginative visual style, HELL'S GATE can be enjoyable.
Just don't expect fresh ideas or anything remotely frightening.
Better be content with occasional gore scenes and a cameo by the one and only Paul Muller.

Exploitation pictures goes forth:THE TURNING (2010)

Dillon and Stacey are having an affair. Stacey's husband Michael hires a P.I. to spy on her.
Soon the lovers are caught in flagrante. Michael attempts to strangle Stacey and Dillon accidentally kills him. The two stick the corpse in the boot of the car and drive off. Once they reach the woods the film shifts into zombie horror territory with Michael coming back to life a zombie. Various other shady characters also drift into the story.

Such is the plot of Jason Impey's THE TURNING, a film starring and produced by
Kemal Yildirim. Yildirim, himself a prolific director/cinematographer has collaborated with Impey on a string of films, including TORTURED a.k.a SEX SLAVE and TORMENTED.

THE TURNING is a more ambitious project from these guys at Exploitation Pictures.
Levels of violence and action have been upped in comparison to earlier works, while the sleaze have been dispensed with altogether. Eileen Daly (CRADLE OF FILTH) co-stars as Ilsa, a mad Hitler-worshipping scientist.

Jason Impey stays true true to his roots, once again setting his film in Milton Keynes, Buckinghamshire. Some of the B/W flashbacks offer you a sort of a guided tour of the city,
from the Shopping Centre to the Milton Keynes Pagoda (previously featured in director's HOME MADE).

There is a decent amount of obligatory zombie gore in THE TURNING

What works:

-There is a lot of great fighting and editing during the action scenes is way slicker than what you'd expect from a self-funded film where lead actors do their own stunts. THE TURNING generally feels more polished than Impey's previous work.

-Epic fight between Kemal Yildirim and Rami Hilmi is a definite highlight.

What doesn't work:

- Dialogue scenes could do with a little trimming. As it is, characters end up saying the same thing over and over again.

-THE TURNING cannot decide what type of film it is -a crime drama, a zombie film, or an over-the-top martial arts epic. These elements, while interesting in their own right, do not blend well to create a whole.

Scenes of Leon and Quaid getting into scuffles are among the
most amusing and hilarious in the film.

Not all the acting in the film can be called great, but THE TURNING compensates for that with sheer energy and some great zombie kills.

My favourite bit of the film (apart from all the action) is a scene inside the shack.
Dillon and Stacey listen to the tape record trying to figure out the reason behind the zombie outbreak. The scene is a little overlong but the distorted voice and all the the Nazi symbols adorning the walls help create an unsettling mood.

So we have a pretty mixed bag here.
On the one hand, a definite step up in terms of action and overall production value.
On the other hand, characters are sketchier than we have come to expect from Impey after
such solid work as, for example, TORMENTED. We never learn exactly what Dillon is. Presumably, just a 'good gangster' type. It's also unclear how the foul-mouthed townie Leon ended up working for the demented Ilsa. It's a shame, but these little things distract from the overall enjoyment of film. Still, the TURNING would make a great introduction to works of Impey and Yildirim for those still unfamiliar with the films of Exploitation pictures. Recommended to those who don't need their zombie horror to be high-budget, studio-funded stuff.

Russian necrorealism: BIPEDALISM (2005)

Not an easy film to review.
Lots of interesting aspects.
An unusual work which I wouldn't want to pigeonhole.
There are too few films coming out of modern Russia that have a strong identity of their own.
BIPEDALISM is definitely original but also quite frustrating.

There is a story (something Yufit could easily do without in the old days),
told in a very deliberate manner.
Took me three viewings to sort of roughly piece it together for myself.
A painter called Victor Vindov takes his wife and two children to the old country house
where they plan to spend the summer. While playing in the basement of the house, the kids find what looks like monkey bones, a diary and several cans of old 35mm film.Victor becomes increasingly unhinged as a result of this discovery. It seems, his primal memory has been awakened. In the meantime the military begin their search for several escaped (sub)human specimen bred as part of a secret 'anthropotechnics' experiment...

There are some very ugly bipeds in BIPEDALISM

Yufit does not try to engage the viewer in a traditional sense.
Whatever drive BIPEDALISM has stems from the sheer oddness of the proceedings.
There are shots of naked men creeping through the woods and across fields.
Their destination is not clear.
Their appearance and the way they move project menace but they're also fascinating to observe, like subjects in a wildlife documentary.

A Russian/Dutch co-production, BIPEDALSIM was financed by Sergei Selyanov (WAR, CARGO 200)
Visually the film is very strong with some elaborate framing.
The obviously post-synchronised soundscape is aggressive and memorable.
Lip movements and dialogue are wildly mismatched.
The director claims to have re-written most of the character's lines
during the sound looping stage, deliberately creating distancing effect and altering the story along the way.

Yevgeny Yufit (born 1961) is a Saint-Petersburg-based filmmaker, founder of the so-called 'necrorealism' movement in Russian cinema. Although his work is regularly screened at festivals across Europe, in his home country he remains a fairly obscure figure, known only to select film buffs. BIPEDALISM is his last feature to date.
Yufit's other recent films include KILLED BY LIGHTNING (2002) and SILVER HEADS (1998)